I Really Did Love Your Kisses....

I wish you were still here so badly Lua Puppy. I cry for you every night. Especially lately. I need to feel your cute puppy kisses. I know I yelled and screamed every time you gave them to me, but I really did love them. And I miss them so much it kills me. I wish I would have thanked you every time you gave them to me, instead of yell. I'm so sorry Lua Puppy. I love you so much.

I'm making a shelf for you. It's taken me a while to figure out exactly what I'm doing- but that's only because I want it perfect for you. I have a few more things to get for it, then I just have to build it and decorate it. I hope you'll like it.

I miss you consoling me Lua. I know that I'm selfish, and I shouldn't be thinking about how badly I need you right now. I should be grateful you are in Heaven and no longer hurting. Which I am. More than you'll ever know. I want you to never feel any pain again- and you won't now. But I just miss you being there for me when no one else is. I miss having you lay next to me in my bed. I miss your puppy kisses. I miss being able to play with you and wrestle with you. I miss how excited you were when I'd come home from work. I miss you playing with your food. I miss you turning in circles when I'd get your leash to go outside. I miss you following me around. I miss you looking at me with your big eyes. I miss.... you. So much.

And I want you to know that even though Second Mom and I aren't doing so well, we'll always be your moms. And we'll always love you more than you could ever know. You'll be in our hearts no matter where we go and how far apart we are from each other. So don't worry.

I don't know when I'll stop crying for you Lua Puppy. I hope it's Ok if it's never.

I love you.

Miss you

I miss you so much Lua Puppy. 2nd Mom made me the cutest Mother's Day gift... it was a musical slide show of you! It made me have lots of tears.... but that's just because I love you so much and miss you in the world's worse way. I'd do anything to have you back, healthy and happy like you were just a few short weeks ago. Not a day goes by that I don't think about what a perfect puppy you were and how lucky I was to be your mom.

I hope you are having fun in Heaven. I love you Lua Puppy.

The Best Puppy EVER!

See that cute puppy up by my blog title?! That's my cutest puppy Kahlua. She's been the best dog anyone could ever hope or pray for. Each day she's been in my life has so much better just because of her presence. She is the epitome of what a dog should be. The type that adamantly proves canine's are "man's best friends".

But as life sometimes does, she's been given a test that she's not going to be able to pass. My poor Lua Puppy has Lymphoma. It's a form of cancer that is very rare in young dogs, but extremely aggressive when existent. Lua has gone from being as energetic and loving as a puppy can be, to listless and docile- fighting for each breath against the cancer that is gripping her lungs. In spite of that, she still does her part to make me feel her love. Even though I know every step for her is one she has no energy for, she still does all she can to welcome me every time I walk through the door... every time I come home. She has the ultimate love. A love that not even severe pain will allow her to repress. That is something that I know God will reward her immensely for. I know that she was meant to be my puppy, even if only for a short time. And she did her job on this Earth like no other animal ever has. And for that, she'll get to eat steak dinners every night in Heaven, I know it. Because even if The Big Guy Upstairs is too busy to cook them for her, my grandma and nephew will make sure she gets a full tummy each meal.

Hopefully, dogs can read in heaven (and they have the Internet too) and my Lua Puppy can read this:

Lua, when I first brought you home I had no idea I could love a pet as much as I love you. You not only moved in my home the day I got you, but you moved into my heart. And that is a place you will forever occupy. The kisses and loves you shared with me will be forever cherished and I only wish I had done more to let you know what a perfect puppy you were to me. If everyone in this world had a puppy like you, I know there would be no hate, no anger, no evil on this Earth. Because having the type of love given to you like you gave to me makes you a better person. Makes you see the good side of the world. And makes you want to only be better person- to ensure you deserve that love. I know I didn't deserve the love you unconditonally gave me. But you couldn't have cared less. You loved me, and you showed me that love. And I will never forget that. I hope all of your pain is gone now. And I hope you have fun chasing all of the kitties in Heaven.

I love you Lua Puppy.